Rockin’ the s**t out of still being a person too!

If this isn’t Mam style then I don’t know what is!!

Fascinator: Borrowed from Mum.
Shoes: Irregular choice- Had for years.
Jewellery: Swarovski- from my wedding.
Bag- Borrowed.
Belt- Off another dress.
AND…
The Dress: £10 from Asda.

But the prices that really matter:
A day without the kids, drinking prosecco with my bestie, watching the races and Olly Murs: Priceless and (it was) well overdue.
Laughs with my bestie: Priceless.
More legendary memories, (yep you guessed it) with my bestie: Priceless.

You have to take time out for yourself. To remember who you were before kids- who you can still be. To just have a goddamn break from the constant-ness of these energy stealing little people. To relax and live a little.
To remember that despite being a parent, you’re still a person too 😘

Here is me rockin the shit out of still being a person too

From the I’m Mama not Mummy Archives: Relish the charms of the present

July 2013

Daddy has brought me and the Wildcat breakfast in bed on his way out to work.

We are sat up in bed eating, (cereal bar for me and Weetabix breakfast biscuits for the Wildcat) when she lies her head on my lap and simply says

“you my best friend”

I will never, ever forget this moment.

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First Time Mum; What the F**k has happened to my life?

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Dear First time Mum,
I know what has happened to your life.

You have grown a little person inside of you- pretty unbelievably incredible. From the minute you started growing them you made sacrifices. They consumed all your energy and the past year or more has been the most tired you’ve ever felt.
You’re so tired you don’t know whether you’re coming or going- you’ve gone from not being tied down to having a person completely dependent on you for their every need. The things you thought were going to happen probably didn’t and the things you never even considered became part of your everyday life.
You’ve put every ounce of your energy into growing and keeping this little person safe. Every ounce of love to protect them. Every ounce of knowledge into caring for them.
You’ve felt like you’ve had no f’in clue what you’re doing and so many people telling you things you ‘should’ be doing. You’ve tried things and they didn’t work. You’ve cried. You’ve laughed. You’ve smiled. You’ve loved like you’ve never loved before.
You’ve lost yourself and who you were amongst the chaos of this massive lifestyle change and your body will never be the same as before. Emotions, hormones and it’s shape.

Some days you don’t think you can cope, you just want to run away but then you feel guilty for even thinking this- how could you ever leave this amazing being that you created!
Some days you just lock yourself away because it’s just easier- it’s easier to be at home where it doesn’t matter if your little one cries, if either of you spend all day in your pyjamas, where you have all your stuff to hand.
But before you know it you’ve shut the world out and you feel lonely. Loneliness like you’ve never known. Your phone is your lifeline but you just don’t get chance to reply to the messages, the notifications get too much and you’re tired.
You need your friends but how the hell do you fit all this in?

You think ‘what the fuck has happened to my life’?

How do I know all this? I’ve been there too. Twice.
So has every other mum I’ve ever spoken to. It’s completely normal to feel like this. But no-one tells you about this do they? I think people must forget the ‘mum feels’ as their kids grow, and hindsight is a wonderful thing- but as I say very inaccurate and not very helpful.

You are normal. This is normal.

Your body, your mind and your emotions have been thrown onto a rollercoaster and set off at 200mph.
You don’t have to have postnatal depression to feel like crap. You don’t have to have postnatal anxiety to feel like crap.
Sometimes our emotions are too much for us, the ‘mum feels’ are too much for us.
YOU ARE NOT ON YOUR OWN! THIS IS NORMAL 💖

Speak out about your ‘mum feels’ – it really does help to talk, and when you hear other people feel the same it’s massively reassuring.
Ask for help if you need it- even if it’s just for someone to come round and make you a brew.
If your friends are Mums, they’ll understand- they will totally get it. If they don’t get it, they’re not your mates.
I know it doesn’t feel like you can right now but you really NEED to make some time for yourself- it’s really important! If you don’t look after yourself you can’t look after anyone else- your mind won’t let you.

If you’re feeling lost at the moment, get your map right here. I’m ready to catch you as you fall. I’m ready to push you back up onto your feet and shout go, you’ve got this!

One Mam and her Squad: Baby Book Club Review by Stacey

IMG_2503I am a big reader myself so I really want to pass this onto my little boy. I’ve read to him since he was first born, although the first few months involved him sleeping and me reading aloud!

Now that he’s paying more of an interest I am keen to read to him as many different books as possible. I purchased the usual ones that most people have and any that I loved from my childhood, which I love reading to him. But I am always looking for new titles.

I saw the Baby Book Club on Facebook and it looked like such a good idea. Different books every month.

I was so excited when the box arrived in the post, it looked lovely. I wasn’t disappointed IMG_2504when I opened it, the books were individually wrapped and beautifully presented. And the theme was one of my favourites…Wishes and Dreams.

The three books were appealing, just from their front covers. Which, let’s be honest, is what most attracts me to books. I hadn’t heard of any of them before which got a big thumbs up from me. This is what I wanted from the book club. FullSizeRender

My little boy is 6 months old and I have read them all to him. The bright colours and pictures captured his interest, maybe a bit too much as he tried to eat one of them! I loved the stories and have now read them to him a few times. My favourite had to be Wishes for You, what a lovely book it is.

I would highly recommend the Baby Book Club for anyone who loves to read to their little ones. It’s such a great concept. Every month is a different theme so you will never get the same kind of books. And as your little ones get older they will be as excited as you to receive their monthly box.

From the I’m Mama Not Mummy Archives: I need a brother!

July 2013 (Obviously pre-Bunny)

So there we are sat at the breakfast table, when the Wildcat announces “I have a brother.”
The Wildcat is my first and only child, so I explain to her that no you don’t have a brother, to be told once again “I have a brother”.
I again explain that she doesn’t have a brother, she thinks for a minute, and then exclaims
“I neeeeeeeedd a brother!”

What would any other parent do in this situation? Your child is two and a half and adamant that if they don’t have a brother, they need one. Tricky situation right?
Daddy is at work, so in panic I say ask daddy, then realise that this is probably a bad idea. A very bad idea!! As much as we want more children, we are getting married next year and have one hell of a wedding to plan before any more little Wildcats appear. I don’t think Daddy will be overly impressed to be greeted home from work by “I neeeed a brother”.
So, after thinking rationally for a minute- or rather look out the window and see the dog innocently relaxing in his kennel, I decide my next plan of action…
“Marni can be your brother?” I tell her.
(Marni is the dog in case you haven’t clicked, Marni short for Armani!)
The Wildcat turns to look at him and then runs to the door. She shouts out “Marni, you want to be my brother?”
Crisis averted we can finish breakfast calmly with no more on the subject of ‘a brother’!!!

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Bunny’s take over 10/05/17

This morning wasn’t really any different to any other day.
I’m awake, I play for a little while until I hear some movement from Mama and Daddy’s room. Then I whinge until someone appears. This morning it was Mama who came to get me.
After a quick chill on their bed I clamber down ready to start trashing the joint. My favourite is to empty all the drawers but I had no time for that this morning.
As soon as that door opens though, I’m outta here. Straight into Sis’s room. I shout her a few times to wake her up. God I’ve missed her. Sis has like the coolest toys ever.

What the… Daddy’s just tried to shoved one of the bristly sticks in my mouth. Bloody hell mate, back off, I only have 7 teeth. You want to start brushing your own teeth in a morning before you start on me.

I get bundled downstairs and strapped into the highchair BUT the tunes are on, get in. Can’t beat having a few tunes blasting out whilst you eat your brekkie.
Eurgh, it’s the ads again, I give Dad the shout and point to let him know he needs to sort this out. Where’s Sis when you need her, she knows the score. Proper good You Tube DJ is our Sis.

When I’ve had enough of shitty toast, I throw it around with a squawk for effect. (Daddy literally can NOT stand that noise, pure brilliance on my part!) The dogs will eat it anyway. A sip of water too then I can launch my cup under the table.
Then I just bide my time. Annnnnd as Mama sits down with her breakfast and a brew it’s game on. I cry, kick and scream until she gets me out.
No-one can stand my screamy crying, instant result.

Mama’s just told me I’m going to Mel’s. “Nana” I tell her. I want to go to Nana’s. Don’t get me wrong Mel’s is awesome once I’ve got over Mama fucking off and leaving me with a complete stranger. (Well she’s not really a stranger anymore.) But Nana, well she has an endless supply of food- biscuits and fruit pots. Lets me play with the fruit out of the fruit bowl, then still makes everyone eat it (ha) BUT Nana, well she has cats.
OMG howww AWESOME are cats! They are soooo fluffy and meow and I can grab their tail and pull it AND if you say “ch, ch, ch” they come to you. So cute.
I want to go to Nana’s.

Anyway, the past few days I haven’t really felt like getting dressed so just to really fuck things up I’ve not let Mama dress me. Pahaha, I know right. So as she puts the vest over my head I put my hands up and push it back off. I also scream until I get red in the face just to let her know it’s game on.
I’m really going for it today. She even whipped my nappy off not realising I’d poo’ed, hahaha. But now Daddy’s involved. FFS. I’ve been manhandled into my clothes but I’m abit tired from all this creating now. I’ll give Mama a snuggle I think.

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It suddenly dawned on me

Today I lay on the rug with Bunny whilst she was drinking her milk. And I just happened to notice her hands holding her bottle.

How big they’ve got.

Chubby, squishy toddler hands. No longer delicate, little baby hands.

This week I’ve really noticed things she’s picking up on and is pointing out. Like at school pick up the other day, we were early so went to sit on the bench in the playground. She pointed over to where we normally wait and said “Sis”.
Tonight at bedtime she finished her milk, passed me her bottle and said “Na’night”.
How she regularly answers yes or no.

On the way home from school today we stopped off at the park. The Wildcat unexpectedly saw her school friend. They ran upto each other and hugged like teenagers do!
At home, she was showing my her uber wobbly tooth. (Which completely cringes me out by the way!)

And it suddenly dawned on me, how did we get to this point?
Chubby, toddler hands, an understanding of the world and a growing independence.
School uniform, wobbly teeth and friendships she’s formed all by herself.

Independence.

I have no idea how we’ve got to this point but we have.